See, the thing with superheroes is that they are SUPER. They can do what no other human can. They can fly, scale walls, shape-shift, become invisible, create holes in walls with a punch, run at the speed of light, elongate their body parts (stop thinking too much, u perv!), stay underwater and breathe like a fish, become huge in size, or at times as small as an atom. The list is endless. Not only of their special abilities, but of themselves too!
The past few days have been very super-humane for me! The thing is that I have always been fascinated with superheroes. Not that 25 zillion other people around the world have not been. With me, I feel, it’s a little different. It's quite prolonged! Ever since I was a kid, till now, when I am on the wrong side of the twenties (wish I had the power to stay a certain age! Aah!), superheroes have been an integral part of my not-so-super life.
Like many kids, I used to dress up as my favorite superheroes, tight-fitting clothes with the undies over them, cape n all! (They were mighty uncomfortable, I tell ya! These superheroes really have balls of steel!) I even cut out Superhero Logos and attached them to the clothes I would wear! (the ones on the cape never survived for more than 10 minutes! Bah, so much for being a Superhero Logo out of ordinary paper!)
So, to cut a long super-story short, I wanted to be a superhero. Uhhh… actually I just wanted to have superpowers! I didn’t really care much about being the protector of the universe, the Earth, my country, state, city, neighbourhood… (you get the message!) I just wanted to have those amazing super-powers! What all could I do with them! I guess I had more mischievous plans rather than heroic ones! (*MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!*)
Few of the powers I have always wanted!
01. Super Strength:- No explanations required there I guess! Who would not wanna be really powerful, so that you could bash up the neighbourhood bully. Or any bully. Sometimes your teachers also. Anyone who tried to bully you, in any way. And you could get away with it too, because you were a Superhero!!!
02. Flight:- aah! I was under the impression that I was the only kid who secretly wished he had THAT power. But, unfortunately and sadly, I got to know that almost every kid has had this power on his/her super-wish-list at least once in their lifetime. Again, being able to fly is something that man has been trying to do for ages. As far as I can remember, even Daedalus and Icarus wanted to fly. Now that’s some Greek Mytho there. So, for times immemorial, "Flight" would be man's favourite super-power!
03. Invisibility:- Now, THAT’S one power I'd luuurrrrrrrrve to have! The power to be able to get all kinda information, without getting caught! The power to sneak up on your 'enemies' without being seen! The power to enter school, even if you were late! To leave house without permission! To see the neightbourhood girl while she took a…. ok ok, that’s enough.
04. Scaling Walls:- Peter Parker was a guy I could relate to! He was somewhat a loser, a geek, young, and not-so-rich! And he was so cool! I wanted to don a Spidey suit n scale walls! And yea, to add to that, I wanted the ability to spin webs too! (I had a red and blue colored pajama set too, and with the help of a black marker pen and some spidey paper-cutouts and a Spiderman mask, I had the best Spidey suit in my circle of friends! Not to forget the best spanking from mom for doing that. And the dream of being a local Spiderboy just scaled up the wall and FLEW away… AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT. Such is life, I say!)
05. Elasticity:- That one was on the list for sometime, especially during the years when I used to feel quite vertically challenged, and friends would tease me about being a "bonsai". But when the biological system decided that I shouldn’t remain a bonsai, the power also disappeared from the wish list, at the speed of light! WHOOOOOOOOOSH! (wasn’t much useful anyway! :-D )
06. Speed Of Light:- The name says it all! I could win all races! ALL of them! I could pinch the local bullies in the places that hurt 'em most, and would just… RUN!! Now THAT would be some fun!! (I could even impress my classmates of the opposite gender! They liked fast people!)
07. Shape-Shifting:- Yes, I wanted to do that too! There were times when I wanted to be a car, a rocket, a dog, a kangaroo, a dolphin, a bear, a bat, a turtle… How much fun that would be!!! I even wanted to be a mutant for a brief period of time, thanks to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and the X-Men. … Then I reached middle school and realized that wasn’t biologically possible.
Well, the list might go on, but I guess these were the seven most important super-powers I wanted to have. Later on, during the course of my life, I realized that acquiring these powers would be a little difficult, if not entirely impossible. So I decided I could still be a superhero, without any REAL super-powers! I would go the Bruce Wayne/Batman or Tony Stark/Iron Man routes, create some scientifically designed armour suits and vehicles, and still be able to do all the things I dreamt of!
Another realization hit. All of this required money and technical expertise. That was great! The only sad part was, I had none. So, I decided to become a scientist. And I studied hard. No no, not my course-books… Comic books! And I kept dreaming, in true Piscean fashion.
Later on, I grew older and somewhere down the line the dream of becoming a scientist was kinda lost, and I decided to become a software engineer (thanks to the IT Boom of the late 90's). Uh-oh, hang on. I also wanted to become a doctor!
So, I took the decision of opting for a weird combination of subjects for my +2 schooling. The combination that even the best of the best students, the brightest ones, dreaded. They could have a stroke or a cardiac arrest thinking about it! Some were strong willed. They only had nightmares, leading to them wetting their beds at night.
I was different. I was a Superhero in the making, after all. So I opted for that dreaded combination. PCBME (Physics, Chemistry, Biology, Mathematics, English.)
As you would have guessed by now, I ended up being none. For my "higher studies", I opted Business Management. (It's a different story that my friends and I gave "higher" studies a totally new dimension!)
Later on, I became a Radio Jockey. And now, I am a TV Anchor.
Who am I? I am Confuso-Man!
Later on, I was exposed to the world of Hard Rock and Heavy Metal. There was this deep burning desire to become a rockstar too. But the story of that in some other post. Right now, I gotta go and do some "world-saving" for now! (That means watching Superhero movies and reading my freshly-downloaded-collection of Superhero Comic Books.)
Hmmm… quite theatrical, isn’t it?
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* "Hmmm"ing during the writing of this post:-
Bud: you are weird
me: yes
i know!
n i am soon gonna give u solid proof of that!
Bud: ooook
Umm I look forward to it
me: hmmm
Love, Peace n Harmony,
Prateek/Sam. a.k.a Confuso-Man
© The Humming Buds Dec 2008
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